Self-esteem is a subject that I have researched and researched. I wanted to know what type of help and resources were out there. As a Life Coach I deal in the area of self-esteem, self-confidence and self-image. This journey started with my own personal experiences in these areas. You see, I was always the one that was in the background never wanting to be seen. The reason for this was that I always felt inadequate as a person. I did not have confidence in my appearance, speech, and overall personality. These feelings had no bearings on my characteristics or my personality, but I had no clue. I would watch my cousins and friends flourish personally and socially with no trouble at all. It seemed to me that they had all the confidence in the world. They did not seem to fear being labeled or misunderstood. For me, these were the things that kept me in fear of trying. Social interactions were events that I shied away from.
I was born into a large family of cousins, aunts and uncles. They were known in a lot of areas both in and out of the secular world. When I was introduced or was in a setting with them I always got – you are a Hogan? I haven't seen you before! All the time I would think, I've been around, just in the background as usual. The truth of the matter was I did not have enough confidence in myself to speak up at social events. I lacked the confidence to display my knowledge on certain subjects. My low self-esteem kept me from having meaningful relationships – therefore always settling for less. My desire not to be seen always gave the impression that I was unapproachable and an unpleasant person to be around.
As I look back on many events that happened in my life I began to see a pattern of behavior that kept me from moving forward. I would get so excited about things learned (new skills, information to advance) and want to put them to use. I would start implementing things and as soon as I hear a less then encouraging comment from someone, I immediately decide to quit. These comments could have been from loved ones and enemies – it did not matter. I relied on what others said about me and their perception. Back then I was not even sure what self esteem was, let alone how to build it.
This also affected my relationships with the opposite sex and my ability to build lasting friendships. I would always find myself settling for relationships that caused me more harm than good. I went from one bad relationship after another - one failed dream after another. Over the next several days I will pour out my heart, giving you insight to my own personal journey to a healthy self-esteem - striving in business, relationships and personal relationship with God.
Tell me your experience:
Have you ever felt inadequate as a person?
Have you desired to pursue a dream, but lacked the confidence?
Have you ever wondered what it would feel like to live a fulfilling life, pursuing your dreams?
